What Never Quitting Does To You

I am not someone to blog long posts. If you are my regular reader you'll know that I usually blog short poems. The reason being that I am obviously lazy. But this time, I am blogging an article. This is not about any of those 'current problems of the society'  stuff, but rather something everyone had quite read and might as well as bored by now . Ya ya, the same piece of inspiring article. This one is a chapter from my own Life.


This story can be considered as the second part of my one of the previous post Pain and Regrets!  For those who missed that piece, to tell you in short, I was shut out from National University of Advanced Legal Studies (NUALS), kochin, One of the 11 best law schools of the country, for a difference of 4 marks. But that is how the system works. 4 marks or 1 mark, if you din't get it then no re-thinking, you are out of there!! And it was my dad who gave me the support every time I needed, though the NUALS incident hurt  him more than it ever did me. . .


I was emotionally crushed after that incident, but it was he, who pulled back the spirit in me to stand up and fight again. It was my dad's 'never quite no matter what' advice that put me here now!


He made me forget the NUALS  and made me try for All Kerala 5yr LLB  Entrance Examination. It was he who went through newspaper and found me a coaching class. It was him, who bought me books to refer. It was him who mend my broken spirit.


After the exam, I got worried about the result. Even though I had worked harde for this exam more than I had ever been for any, yes not even for my 10th and 12th borders did I study so much! But even then the ghost of my previous failure haunted me close... I would always say, 'If its in my fate i'll get it' and my dad he would reply 'There is nothing called fate, its the result of the hard work you put into'. And my dad was right. As my hard work did bring me the result I wanted. I passed out with 23rd rank all Kerala. 


So I dedicate this post to my father, who taught me What Never Quitting Does To You !! I love you dad, thanks for all the support and encouragement. You are the world's best dad!! XOXO!!! 

Memories Of A Dream

Last night I was disturbed... It took me long to fall into the obligation of sleep. I knew this for sure because I was staring at the bright clock in the dark room. It was well before 1 AM. I knew something was bothering me but i couldn't see what it was. I concentrated on my inner voice, but i dint hear anything... I turned around the bed wishing for the peace of sleep to find me... And finally I took my mobile, plugged the ear phone and set to hear some melodies....


The next thing I knew was the sound of my mom calling me, 'Wake up. wake up'. the fear in her voice or the coldness of her awoke the usually lazy me in an instant. I looked into her face. In the bright light of the florescent lamp, I saw the tears flowing down her eyes. I felt an odd kind of pain seizing my soul... After a moment I found my voice and asked her, 'Mama what happened?'  Her answer was more tears that squeezed my heart more. 'Mama, tell me what happened?' I shook  her. And in her tears all she managed was a single word, 'DAD......'.For a moment I was stuck in place. I felt the blood leaving my face and the coldness wrapping around me....


I ran to my dad's room.... Did I hit the sofa? I don't remember....All i  remember is the cold, pale, lifeless body of my dad lying on the bed.... I heard someone howling, and realized it was my own voice... Suddenly the force to balance gravity was no more in me..... I dint feel myself slipping down... I didn't feel the tears falling down.... I dint feel the coldness of the floor below me....I dint hear the sounds escaping me. I don't know how much time I sat like that... I wasn't aware of anything other than the fact that my dad is no more. The foundation on which I build my world is no more there... I felt like being crushed... I felt like being teared apart... The person I loved and respected more in the world is no more there.... I couldn't imagine my world anymore.... It doesn't exist....I don't exist... I felt my vision getting blurred...


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I woke up with a rush.. For a minute, I dint know what was happening. I shook my head thrice before I cleared my vision. my eyes were staring at my book self. I turned around but found nothing unusual. I checked the time and it was 7 in the morning.


I realized I was just dreaming... I couldn't stop the sigh that left me. I got out of bed and ran to the living area where my dad sat reading the morning news paper. For a minute I couldn't stop the single drop of tear that slipped from my eyes.... I don't remember how long I  stood there looking at him before he saw me and asked me ' Oh, what happened? You woke up early today'. 


I just smiled at him and went to sit with him........